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You’re feeling full of appreciation for a friend or family member for a beautiful gift or a loving act of service they’ve provided you. Unfortunately, sitting down to write out a thank you note can be a daunting task. Where to begin when expressing your gratitude? We’re here to help – with some simple guidelines, writing out a message of gratitude can be a breeze!
In an increasingly informal world, it’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that a handwritten thank you card is excessively formal and unnecessary. The truth is, sending a handwritten thank you note is not only a great way to show your appreciation, it also shows that you value and respect your thank you note recipient. Whether they’ve given you a thoughtful gift or done you a great favor, they’ve given you something valuable, and taking the time and effort to write a heartfelt thank you note shows that you recognize that.
It’s not just good manners to write out a thank you card. A handwritten thank you card is something that your card recipient can treasure. Compared to an email or text message, a thank you card is perceived as warmer and more personal. Amidst piles of bills and junk mail, a pretty thank you card arriving in the mail is a pleasant little surprise, and especially for faraway friends and family, it can serve as a physical reminder of a cherished relationship. By writing a handwritten thank you card, you’ll also set yourself apart from the crowd as someone with class and style, as well as a talent for expressing yourself and making others feel appreciated.
Writing good notes of appreciation is an easily acquired skill, but it can feel tricky if you don’t practice it often. The more you practice expressing your gratitude and putting your feelings into words, the more natural it will feel, and before long, you’ll find yourself looking forward to sending little notes of gratitude for all sorts of occasions!
If you ever find yourself wondering if you need to send a thank you card, the answer is probably yes. There’s never really a situation where a thank you card is inappropriate – even if it’s for something small, your card recipient will love feeling appreciated. In fact, if you send a card for something that might seem small, your recipient will probably love it more!
There are some times when you absolutely should send a thank you card, however. Any time you’re given a gift or someone goes out of their way to provide you with a big favor, write a thank you card. Some hopefully obvious events that require writing thank you cards include:
Some other occasions that merit a thank you card that might be a little less obvious include:
An area of controversy for handwritten thank you notes is after job interviews. A job interview always merits a thank you note. Sending a thank you after an interview is polite, it will help the interviewer remember you, it reinforces your interest in the position, and it gives the impression that you will contribute to a positive work culture. In most cases, sending a thank you via email is appropriate after a job interview. It gets the point across, and it gets to the interviewer more immediately, which is important when things are moving quickly. In certain industries, like hospitality, sending a handwritten thank you card in addition to an email may be well received, and it will set you apart from other candidates. Use your judgment about whether this is necessary in your field.
Don’t limit yourself when it comes to occasions for writing a thank you card. If something makes an impression on you, go ahead and write that card! A kindly worded thank you card is never going to be received badly.
A well worded thank you card can be kept short and sweet while getting your point across effectively. This general formula can be applied to almost all occasions requiring a thank you card.
Begin your card with a salutation that addresses your recipient. You can make this more or less formal depending on your relationship with the recipient. Make sure that you’re addressing everyone who needs to be included – that means that if you went to a dinner party hosted by a couple, thank them both, or if you received a gift with a note signed by the whole family, address your card to the whole family (although for group gifts including members of different households, send individual cards to each household included).
The most commonly used greeting for all types of cards is “dear,” which is perfectly appropriate for formal or informal thank you cards. When addressing someone you know well, you may address them casually by their first name only or with a nickname. When addressing someone more formally, you might use their first and last name, or address them as Mr. or Mrs. or another title that they use.
Begin your note by directly thanking the person for the gift or favor. Say exactly what it is that they gave you or did for you that you appreciated. This is the most important part of your note – make sure you get the point across by explicitly saying thank you. Here are some ways you might choose to get started:
After your initial thank you, get specific about why the gift or favor was meaningful to you. Be honest here – don’t exaggerate and say that that shirt you were given for your birthday is your favorite article of clothing ever, or that a small favor literally changed your life (unless those things are true, then go for it!). If you were given a gift, tell your recipient how you are looking forward to using the gift. If you’re saying thank you for a favor or kind gesture, let them know how that impacted you. You can keep it short and simple, or elaborate as much as you like.
Move on from your thanks and appreciation by shifting the focus from the gift or favor to your appreciation of your recipient as a person. Oftentimes this is a great place to look ahead to the next time you might see this person, like an upcoming event, or suggest that you get together or catch up at some future time. If it’s unlikely that you’ll see them anytime soon, you can also use this time to say what they mean to you, give a compliment, or just let them know you’re thinking of them. Here are some things you might say:
Bring your note to a close by saying one more thank you. This way you make it super clear that your gratitude is what your note is all about. Since you’ve already gotten pretty specific, keep this last sentence short, sweet, and to the point:
Close your letter with a warm sign off. There are so many ways to do this – and again, the way you choose to do this will have a lot to do with how well you know your recipient and how formal or informal you want your message to be. Here are some of our favorite ways to end a thank you card:
We’ve written some complete example thank you messages that you can personalize to adapt for your own needs, or use as inspiration for writing your own unique thank you message.
Dear Mr. and Mrs. Johnson,
We wanted to let you know how much we appreciate your beautiful gift- thank you so much! We’ve been needing some decorations to brighten up our living room, and the hand painted picture frame is the perfect touch on our end table. We’re having family pictures taken soon, and your frame will be the perfect place for displaying our favorites. We’ve been thinking of you lately – hoping to see you soon when we’re in town! Thanks again for your thoughtfulness.
Yours,
Steve and Lisa
Dear Aunt Mary,
Thank you so much for your generous gift of money for my graduation. I’m starting to buy some supplies for my desk in my dorm room, and I’m planning to use the money for some pretty notebooks for my classes. I really appreciate your support over the last few years – you’ve always encouraged me to go after my goals, and your belief in me has helped me get into my dream program! I can’t wait to tell you about my college adventures when I see you at Thanksgiving! Thanks again for your generosity!
Love,
Lucy
Dear Gina,
I will forever be grateful to you for your help this last week. Thank you so much for being there for me and taking the kids off my hands when I had to take my mom to the hospital and my world felt chaotic. You allowed me to put my focus where it was needed most – and the kids had a blast hanging out with you for the afternoon! One of these days I’m treating you to a coffee to pay you back! Once again, you’re a lifesaver – thank you!
Sincerely,
Jen
Dear Dr. Brown,
Thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to further discuss your open position for an executive assistant. I was so interested to learn more about your company’s mission and I’m inspired by what your company is doing. I’m very excited about the possibility of getting to work with you and your team, and I look forward to hearing from you. Thanks again for your time and consideration!
Kind regards,
Tracy Robinson
There are no hard and fast rules when it comes to writing a thank you card, but general card writing etiquette applies, as well as some etiquette guidelines.
When writing a thank you card, you want to send it to your recipient soon enough to keep it relevant. If you’re writing a thank you for a favor someone did for you, try to send it within a week. If it’s for a larger event where you have a lot of thank you cards to write, like a wedding shower or baby shower, sending thank you cards within a month of the event is ideal (for weddings, this is extended to three months).
If you’re busy and it’s taken you a while to get around to that thank you card you’ve been meaning to send, don’t think it’s too late. A thank you card is still a kind gesture, even if it takes a bit longer to send than you’d like.
Pick a thank you card or stationery that’s appropriate for the event at hand. Most generic thank you cards are fine for most occasions. But if you’re writing a professional thank you card to a prospective employer or a valued client, you may want to opt for something less frivolous and more neutral.
Use a writing utensil that shows up clearly on your paper, and use your best penmanship, especially if you know your handwriting can sometimes be difficult to read.
When thanking someone for a cash gift, it’s not necessary to mention the exact amount you were given – in fact, mentioning the amount can come off as rude. Thank them for the money, let them know how you plan to use it, or what you are going to put it towards if you’re making a larger purchase, and leave it at that.
Most importantly, be your authentic self in your thank you note. Write as naturally as you can, and think of how you might express your gratitude in person if you get stuck. If you write from the heart, your thank you note is sure to be well received.
Make an impact with a thank you card that perfectly matches the occasion or your personality. Now that you’re ready to write that thank you note, pick a pretty card to make your message extra special! Shop our collection of thank you cards here.
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